Life as a New Mom: Second and Long (Really, Really Long) [PHOTOS, VIDEO]

I learned something new this weekend: you can't watch a football game with a toddler. I tried; I failed, and now I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that getting my kid to sit still and be quiet during a game is as likely as my going on a date with Ryan Gosling. IT JUST AIN'T HAPPENING.

My plan Saturday (we stayed at home, BTW; not brave enough to take her tailgating yet) was to grill some hot dogs and have our little fam gather 'round and watch the Crimson Tide drown hopes of a jort-clad, white-trash Gator Nation. (Totally hate Florida, BTW.) My plan failed miserably.

I should have known that a two-year-old is incapable of watching anything, even Frozen, for four hours.

I watched about... five minutes of the game. I chased her around the living room. I attempted to keep her entertained with Crayolas and puzzles and stuffed animals, but she was NOT HAVING any of it. She straight up refused to let me watch the game. I gave up. After all, it's just a football game...

Dolly and I retreated to her room where we played. It turned out to be a blessing in disguise: the first quarter of the game was super frustrating, and she didn't need to be learning any cuss words from Mommy if you get what I'm saying...

Anyway, I didn't mind. I had fun pretending to attend her tea parties with Hello Kitty, coloring pictures, and reading books. I enjoy quality time with my kiddo. She's so bright and funny, and I feel as if I get to know her more each day.

We went to the park yesterday morning, and she climbed on the playground equipment like it was no big thang--I, on the other hand, was terrified that she'd fall. She didn't--she just kept on running and jumping and giggling. Check out a few of the videos I took during our trip to the park below.

Dolores is saying, "Come on, Daddy!" #mydolly #park #Tuscaloosa #instacute

brave bird #mydolly #park #Tuscaloosa #instacute

bird in flight #mygirl #toddler #instacute